Tenuous

I had it for a day. I felt thin. My thighs did not seem to rub so much and I felt like there was enough space between my wrists and hips. When I breathed out, I could feel the waistband of my jeans drop because nothing was holding them up. All day long, I kept running my hands over my stomach, examining its new flatness.

That was yesterday. At night, I went to the gym for two hours and sweated until they threw me out. I came home and went to bed, snuggling my husband who was already asleep.

When I woke up this morning, I felt fat again.

I was feeling so good when I got home that I laid out my measuring tape and the book in which I keep my stats so I'd remember to check in the morning. Sure enough, I'm down eight inches overall from a month ago (neck, chest, shoulders, waist, hips, right and left biceps, right and left thighs, right and left calves). I'm also down an additional two pounds from yesterday.

That lovely feeling, however, is gone. I was sleek, light, fast, like a kite or a bird. Today I just feel like me again. Somewhat akin to a potato.

Oh, Fuck

Crapcrapcrap. I suck. Scratch that, I don't suck. I've just been balls-out busy. Thirtieth birthday came and went and somehow I'm still alive. I keep yo-yoing the same ten pounds. I've lost inches off of my waist but the hips refuse to budge.

Ana's Girl, I sincerely apologize for disappearing right before a challenge. I hope you're doing well. Many many congratulations on your wedding, I hope you love married life as much as I do.

That's it for now. I'll be in touch.